My testimony begins with sharing a little about where I was before I invited Jesus into my life. I was married, had two grown children, a good job, and a beautiful home on two acres. Yet somehow, I felt unfulfilled, empty, lost, like something was missing. I finally decided I’d try visiting a nearby church, and chose a particularly large one because of the name, “New Hope.” I also chose it because it was quite large and I knew I could get lost in the crowd. I sat high in the balcony and listened attentively. Toward the end, the pastor invited anyone who wanted to ask Jesus to come into their hearts to simply raise their hand. He said all heads would be bowed so no one would know except you and God. Something inside of me knew I needed to do this, so I slowly raised my hand as tears began to fall from my eyes.
I didn’t know why I was crying, but I couldn’t help it. The tears just kept coming. Then, I felt someone behind me gently touch my left shoulder and whisper if it was okay if she prayed for me. She then said her name was Joyce and proceeded to pray. Well, when I heard her name, I really started crying, I mean really crying, complete with heaving shoulders and uncontrollable sobbing. Joyce just happened to be my recently deceased mother’s name and she had always wanted me to invite Jesus to come into my heart.
The tears kept coming uncontrollably as she prayed for me. It was as if a lifetime of held-back feelings could suddenly be released. There was a flood of emotions that seemed to flow out of me all at the same time…long-held grief, pain, guilt, unworthiness, sorrow, and emptiness – all those emotions that we try to push down and keep hidden.
Then, out of nowhere the most beautiful calm came over me. I cannot put it into words. It was as if a warm healing balm had been poured over me from head to toe. I somehow felt washed in it, completely comforted, peaceful, accepted, unconditionally loved and no longer empty. There was an unexplainable peace and calm that wasn’t there before. Mostly, it was an inexpressible feeling of love and acceptance.
That was the beginning. I had opened the door to my heart. God had big plans for me in the coming years. It was a slow, gentle beginning, but I soon started hearing messages, seeing visions, and dreaming dreams. There were also miracles and supernatural events to come – including a visit with Jesus in what I believe was heaven (see Dreams 2020), a miracle healing, and angelic visitations! (See Supernatural.)
Was it simply a coincidence that the woman’s name was Joyce? I think not. My mother was a strong believer and always wanted me to believe and be baptized. She did not see it in her lifetime, but I finally did come to know Jesus and get baptized. After I was baptized, God really started moving in my life! I had no idea why all the messages and supernatural encounters were given to me, but I knew it was for a purpose, and that I was to record them, and someday share them.
This is that someday – FOR SUCH A TIME AS THIS. (See Messages 2017.)
“Behold, I stand at the door and knock:
if anyone hears my voice, and opens the door, I will come in…”
Revelation 3:20