November 7, 2016 Woke to: “Propitiation”
This was not a word in my vocabulary! Later that day, I decided to run some errands after poor communication with my daughter regarding the election, and telling her I had voted for people I thought had more conservative values, and how I was disturbed by the moral decay happening in the world today.
When I got in the car, I felt a wave of deep sadness and began to weep, and as I turned on the radio, I immediately heard the words “dilemma” and “propitiation!” I remembered I had heard propitiation during the night and quickly googled it as I had no idea what it meant. Again, this was not an accident! It was supernatural.
Well, of course I wept even more after reading that. I had told my daughter that I wanted to please God more than I wanted to please her (how she wanted me to vote). This caused her to leave my life from that day forward to this day in 2020. I have felt deep, deep sorrow as I have not seen her, my son-in-law, or my precious granddaughter since then.
However, I came to realize that was exactly what God was asking me to do. Was I willing to put Him first, even if it meant losing contact with my precious and only daughter?
It was a test. I knew it and I felt it. It is still a test.
December 9, 2016
As my husband and I were listening to a Christian channel (after my crying the entire day before over the situation with my daughter), the speaker was talking about Revelation and went on to say how God prefers us to be hot or cold, not lukewarm, which is exactly where I felt God was leading me, to be completely all in for Him, even at the sake of my children, and ALL OF A SUDDEN…the radio switched to an FM station with foul language rap music. My husband and I looked at each other. HOW COULD THAT HAPPEN??? We each tried pushing the little switch back to AM, but it would not move without much more force than usual.
We were both stunned. There is no way that happened on its own. The enemy truly knows we have work to do for God. We are never to fear, however, because we know, “Greater is He that is in us, than he that is in the world.” 1 John 4:4